Wedding Invitations with Arras: Explain the Ceremony

The officiant says 'and now we exchange the arras', and you watch it happen in real time. Your friend from Manchester looks at the tray, then at the person next to her, then back at you. Coins? A pouch? Is this part of the rings? She will work it out. But she will spend the next two minutes doing arithmetic instead of watching your faces. Wedding invitations with an arras ceremony can settle it with one line.

The arras are not a second set of rings. They are a separate gesture, with their own meaning, their own moment and their own bearer, and guests who did not grow up with them will not know that. In Spain thirteen coins is the common number; seven is just as valid. What matters is that you say which number you chose and why, once, in writing, before the day.

The arras aren't one more ring

Think of the arras as the point where you stop talking about the future and hand something over. Small coins in a linen pouch. A promise that you will carry things together, not that one of you will carry the other. That deserves its own sentence from the officiant, not a quick 'and now the arras' tacked onto the rings.

• Thirteen coins is the Spanish tradition, but seven works too, or the number of years you have been together. Say the number and the reason on the invitation.
• Choose who holds the pouch or the tray. Pick someone who would be standing near you anyway, so nothing has to be arranged mid-ceremony.
• Give the exchange its own announcement. 'The exchange of the arras' tells guests this is a moment, not an admin step.
• Decide where the coins go afterwards. If they end up in a box, write that down, or they disappear into the hugs.

Wedding invitations with arras: the script your guests need

Before: one scene in your invitation covers who carries the arras and when it happens. 'Carried by my brother Tomas, exchanged after the vows, before the rings.' That sentence is enough for anyone who has never seen this done.

During: ask your officiant to name the moment out loud and have one person you trust hold the tray. Nobody has to stand up. After: if the arras go into a box or a tin, say so on the invitation page. Otherwise they vanish between the confetti and the first round of photographs.

The arras don't need a speech. They need one sentence, one person carrying them, and a clear place in the ceremony.

Etiquette for guests who have only seen rings

The questions will arrive by message anyway, usually the week before. If a guest asks whether they should bring coins, the answer is no. You provide the arras, and they pass between the two of you or with your godparents. They are not thrown, not shared out and not handed around the room: they are blessed and kept. For older relatives, one line on the invitation settles it without a lecture at the table: 'The arras are a symbol of what we will share.'

Where the arras sit in the ceremony

In Spain the usual order is after the vows and before the rings. Confirm it with your officiant so it does not land on top of a reading. A civil ceremony can include the exchange just as easily, because it is a symbolic gesture rather than a sacrament, and it can be explained in a scene of the invitation. Name the person who brings the arras to the altar or the table in the invitation itself, so they know the job is theirs.

• Coins: decide how many and why. If you follow the tradition of thirteen, explain it in one line.
• Bearer: the name of whoever carries the arras to the altar or the table.
• Moment: after the vows and before the rings, or whatever you agree with the officiant.
• Wording: one short sentence so the officiant can announce the exchange.
• Destination: where the arras go when the ceremony ends, so they don't get lost.

If you want guests to arrive already knowing what the arras are, a digital invitation lets you write that explanation in your own words and keep it current. Start in free trial mode, build the arras scene the way you would explain it to a friend, and publish the link when the wording reads right.