Hen do invitations with a wish list: where to write it

Four people, one hen do, three identical lavender candles. That is what happens when the group chat asks what she wants and somebody answers "whatever you feel like". Everyone means well. Nobody guesses right.

Hen do invitations with a wish list fix most of it, as long as the list has two things: somewhere to live and one honest line to introduce it. Call it a hen do or a bachelorette, the problem is the same. Both parts fit in the invitation you were going to send anyway.

How to put a wish list inside hen do invitations

Write the wish instead of hinting at it. The list does the work so nobody has to corner the bride's sister in a car park to ask what she actually wants. Be exact, be a little boring, and be done with it.

• Name the thing and where it's from. "One lavender candle from this shop, the small one" beats "anything for the flat".
• Clothes need a size and a colour. "Black T-shirt, size M" saves someone a queue at the returns desk in January.
• Give a range on purpose: something at €15 and something at €60 that five people can split between them.
• Add one line for the people who would rather pay for something you do together than buy an object.

One line in the invitation does the job

Put the ask in the phrase line and keep it short: "If you'd like to bring something, the list is here." The link sits underneath, tappable on a phone. No screenshots, no two-minute voice notes, no "I'll send it to you privately".

Asking is easier in the first person and in short sentences. "We're moving in together in June, so we made a list in case you want to chip in." Split the two jobs: the link, the deadline and who to ask go on one line, and the warm paragraph goes on the cover with the photo. Then name a person. "Any questions, ask Marta" beats making ten guests work out who to message.

A wish list isn't a bill. It's one sentence and one link, and both take about a minute to write.

The link keeps working while you dance

Send the invitation, then change things if you need to. A new meeting point, a later dinner, a different dress code: the link stays the same and every guest sees the updated version. Confirmations come back inside the invitation, in one ordered list, so you know how many you are before you book the long table. Nobody installs an app, on your side or theirs.

When paper still makes sense

If your gran doesn't use a phone, print two copies with the QR code and the link on them and hand those over. Everyone else gets the digital version. Just remember that paper doesn't correct itself: change the date and you are reprinting and handing out again, to everyone, one by one.

Your list already exists. It needs a home and a sentence that introduces it without ceremony. Build the invitation, paste the link, set a deadline, and let the guests work out the rest.