Baptism invitation etiquette: naming godparents in Valencia

You are at the kitchen table, reading the draft of the baptism invitation out loud. Baptism invitation etiquette stops being an abstract thing right there: your partner's mother is listed before yours, and your brother, who is a godparent, has ended up in small print at the bottom of the card. Nobody has said anything yet.

Most arguments about a baptism invitation in Valencia are not about the design. They are about one line: the one where you name the godparents. Get that line right and the rest of the card falls into place.

Baptism invitation etiquette: parents first, then godparents

The classic formula opens with the parents and closes with the godparents. “Ana and Luis, her parents, and Marta and Jorge, her godparents, invite you to the baptism of…” Invert the order and the godparents' family notices immediately. Keep them in the same body text as the parents, or one size down at most. Moving them into small print at the foot of the card is the fastest way to create a problem that lasts the whole day.

• Order of names: parents, godparents, then the baby's siblings if you name them at all.
• Same size for both sets of names. One size down is the limit.
• One godparent only? Write “her godmother, Elena Rodrigo” instead of a vague “and family”.
• Full names exactly as they sign them: “Jorge Iborra Peiró”, not “Jorge and family”.

One language per invitation: Valencian or Spanish

In Valencia, a bateig invitation in Valencian is normal — “els padrins”, “vos conviden al baptisme de”. What sounds off is mixing. A Valencian heading over a Spanish body, or “Padrins” at the top and “Bautizo” at the bottom. Pick one language and stay in it.

If some grandparents only read Spanish, a clean bilingual layout beats half-translated sentences: the Valencian block first, then the same block in Spanish underneath. Proper names do not get translated. Labels do: Bateig/Bautizo, Padrins/Padrinos, Data/Fecha. A digital invitation lets you set the wording per language instead of printing two runs.

The godparents' line is the one everybody reads twice. Write it slowly.

Water godparents, grandparents and everyone else who wants a mention

In Valencian tradition, alongside the baptism godparents there were the padrins d'aigua or de cera, the water or candle godparents. If you keep them, they go after the baptism godparents, with their own label and never on the same line. Grandparents who are not godparents do not belong in the formula: name them in the body text — “with the joy of her grandparents, Carmen and Vicente”. They appear without competing with the people actually baptising. A godparent who cannot come can still be named, with “who celebrates from Lisbon” after their name. Deleting them because they cannot attend is the part that actually offends.

The cases that break the formula

Separated parents: both names appear, each on its own line and at the same size, with no forced “and” that reads like a reconciliation. Godparents who are a couple but unmarried, or two women, or two men: names and surnames, no marital status, no titles they do not use. If a godparent is the baby's brother or is underage, drop the Mr/Mrs and write the name plain. Then make every title in the invitation match. Either all of them with a title, or none.

Write the whole formula before you order anything. A surname typed wrong, a godmother added at the last minute, a venue that moves from the chapel to the restaurant: with paper, all three mean reprinting and resending. With a digital invitation from Send The Joy (€29.99, one-off payment) you edit it after sending and the link stays the same, so guests see the updated version without a second message.